... do I want so badly to belong to an environment I AM not meant for by my present nature, and thus spend a considerable amount of time there.... as opposed to diving head first into that environment which I am SO perfectly designed for by the circumstances and environments I had faced earlier? I am like a fish, that could be an "amazing fish" if I just decided to go into the deeper waters, where I would quite easily be able to probe the deepest depths.. something I, as the fish, am quite aware of by simply examining the nature of my body. But rather, I spend half of my time in the shallow waters, and half on the shore, all this dictated by the tides. I'm drawn to the shore because I've been led to believe it's not a lonely place, unlike the deep waters which I expect to be dark and desolate; but all the evidence I have seems to suggest it is just as lonely (if not more). Why then do I continue to flop so clumsily on the shore, and not accept my reality of being meant for the deep waters?
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